That title really is a misnomer, it should be a Mrs. ONG Halloween. Truth be told, I don’t do a damn thing to prepare for, or during the actual day of Halloween.

I may help the kids cross the street while trick or treating and I may help the kids make fair trades with each other once they have collected all their candy on Halloween night. Other than that, not much more from me.

This year we started a tradition of a Halloween dinner for the kids. It starts with a viewing of the legendary and never matched “The Great Pumpkin” 

The house is decked out Halloween style, some stuff purchased, some of the kids stuff (with only the best making the cut; some times they make crap, let’s not pull punches here).   

Then there is the dinner:

My wife claims it was no big deal and promises bigger and better next year. The kids loved it and I may have loved it even more. Kids don’t forget days like this.

I attempted (key word is attempted) to set up the next event, the pumpkin carving. I figured we would lay out a few blankets in the garage, get some garbage bags, get our carving tools and we would be in business. Here is how it went:

• Blanket unfurled and covered in stink bugs.
• My first attempt to cut off the top of the pumpkin resulted in an incredibly uneven line and I basically cut the poor guy in half.
• Kids get bored because, let’s face it, they can’t really carve unless we make the proper plans for an emergency room visit.
• They knock down tools in the garage while bored, we yell, they want to help more, we say no, they go inside and my wife and I are responsible to complete the task.

We eventually got through it, lit some candles inside the pumpkins, cleaned up and called it a night. The only good photo I could manage was this one:
           

My wife did that one and also carved a bat in another. They looked good.

Mine. Not so much. Pay close attention to the top of the pumpkin, I can’t even hide how poorly I carved the top. A sad, sad effort indeed. 

Happy Halloween
ONG

I’ve written about my neuroses when it comes to garden design and how I find myself rarely satisfied. Maybe “rarely satisfied” isn’t an accurate term. I think, like most gardeners, I just enjoy the challenge of trying to find a more pleasing combination or the excitement of trying something new. It is what makes gardening what it is – an incredibly rewarding and frustrating process – but never dull.

And sometimes, a simple addition or re-arrangement can keep me going for a long time. Case in point, the photo below is an area near my garage, an area I pass by every time I get home from work:

A recent addition of three Acorus gramineus ‘Oborozuki’ (oh how I loved typing that) or sweet flag, just makes me happy when I see it each day. I can’t describe why I love it so much, I just do. I’ll want to change it or add more in the future, but for now, I am digging it. A simple pleasure that gardening gives me each day.

Speaking of simple pleasures, when the kids get along and just do “kid things”, that’s also a pretty damn simple pleasure.      

We’ve got water!

And I’ve canceled my plan to rent out our kids to the highest bidder to pay for it.

Turns out we had a hole inside the water tank and it ultimately shorted out the electrical connection to the pump. I’ll spare you all the mechanical details, not because it is boring, but because I’ll butcher it to the point of personal embarrassment. Oh yeah, I also learned a shower is very underrated.

My initial concern with the water issue was that I didn’t do something I should have to keep up with the proper maintenance. Turns out the answer was “no” so I felt relieved. But, the experience did get me into “proactive” mode knowing I need to develop a much more robust maintenance schedule throughout the house. And that can be an effort when this stuff doesn’t come naturally to you. In fact, I bet one day it will be determined that there is a “home improvement” gene and that over the years that gene has escaped from my family bloodlines.

Of course it is much easier for me to relate to outdoors “maintenance” so I analyzed my preventative efforts there and realized there were none. Seriously, I have never sprayed or fertilized a plant. EVER.

And that also includes the lawn.

Maybe I’ve fertilized an annual in a container but that’s it. Isn’t that a good thing? I was “green” before it became all the rage. I’ve read up on fertilizer and it’s real role in plant development and was never that impressed enough to bother.

To my credit (can’t say that often), I am a smart waterer (sp?). I stick my finger into the soil around every plant before I water, never water overhead getting the foliage wet and promoting disease and do my best to water early in the morning. 

Now that doesn’t excuse me from not using natural options. That is where the lazy part comes in. This is the first year I’ve actually composted with a real effort. My motto for the past six years has been, I’ll give a plant one shot to survive my harsh conditions and if they don’t cut it, off with their heads. Is that smart and a means to keep things simple? I don’t know, but I will make a concerted effort this winter to educate myself and we’ll see what the spring will bring.

What are your thoughts on fertilizer, preventative spraying,etc?       

This was the quintessential autumn weekend.

With the autumn foliage at it’s peak, we headed down to the Delaware River and “attempted” to take the kids photos for this year’s Christmas cards. They could have cared less and protested most of the way, but we got a few nice shots we can work with. 

I also managed to take a few non kid photos:

With the cooler weather and some actual rain, the lawn actually looks presentable:

We had a nice relaxing Sunday morning with nowhere to go (woo hoo), and that meant time for large consumption of coffee (and yes I do drink it black):    

The house was all decked out for Halloween:

My son  and I played a heated game of indoor basketball (I kicked his ass of course)

 

My incredibly creative daughter was “playing” as only she can:

Even Casey was relaxed and enjoying the casualness of the day:

It was autumn perfection … and then my wife called downstairs, “Hey John, funny little thing happened, I ran out of water completely while in the shower.” SON OF A %$&^!!!

And with that, everything changed. I ran down to the basement in a panic, hoping that just maybe, there was a simple explanation. Not a chance.

I am still covered in salt residue, smell like death and the kids are on a no poop alert. The well company is  coming early in the morning and hopefully there will be a simple and cheap explanation for it.

We’ll see.      

I am completely consumed with the show “Hoarders” and the complexity behind the “disease”. There is some serious psychology behind people who hoard and I find it utterly fascinating. While watching the show, I start out disgusted with these affected individuals, then become furious that they have affected their families along the way. The emotion then turns to one of sympathy as each layer is pulled back on their psyches.         

OK, where am I going with this? Right where you think I’m going, just not in such a serious manner. This box arrived yesterday and it kicked off a thought in my head immediately.

Another plant delivery had arrived and I ain’t got the slightest idea where any of these plants will be going. Not to mention, we are nearing the end of October and it may not be such a good idea to try and get these in the ground now. But who cares about all that, I got me a whole bunch of grasses at $2.99 a pop. How do you turn that down?

And then it hit, am I a “plant hoarder”? Is it the thrill of the purchase and hitting “submit” on the web site that gets me off? Is it fulfilling a need now that the gardening season is drawing to a close? Should I contact TLC or HGTV and pitch a new reality show?

I then decided to explore my potential disease a bit further.

Do I purchase plants and then forget about them? Um, yes, like these in my garage from the past spring          

Do I use my raised bed as a holding ground for plants I can’t find a place for rather than as a chance to grow plants not suited for my soil. Um, yes again 

Do I place random plants in containers and then hide them from public view. Um, a big fat yes.

Do I purchase plants cheap knowing they do not fit any of the cultural conditions required, stick them in a pot and try to sell them as a part of a Halloween vignette? Uh oh    

Guilty as charged on all accounts.

But, I quickly justified it all after deeper analysis:

• While some plants may never see the light of day, those that do provide an educational experience. Buying them cheap and and therefore small allows me the chance to watch the growing process and these plants usually out do their fully grown/forced nursery counter parts.
• Last time I checked, having extra plants in the garage or mixed throughout the yard never hurt anybody or created deep psychological wounds.
• Hoarding small, cheap plants allows me the opportunity to experiment with plants I can’t find in the local nursery and with a minimal investment.
• Most of the plants I hoard are from native plant sales and they tend to recover well if they are neglected for a while. And you can’t go wrong going native.
• Hoarding plants takes up a lot of time and keeps me off the dangerous streets and out of trouble. 

So with that, my name is John Markowski, and I am a plant hoarder … and frickin proud of it.                   

The writer’s block is gone and thank you for all of your comments on the last post. They truly meant a lot to me.

I hope it didn’t come off like “Boo hoo, I have nothing for my blog, woe is me, life is over.” I just really felt uninspired at the time as it had been “guns a blazing” since the inception of this little project. I knew it would happen, know it will happen again, but I ain’t stoppin any time soon. This is too much fun.

So, my mindset today was one of appreciation of all that I have as I wandered the premises. I thought, I’ll share these feelings with you all, because my narcissistic brain told me, you all care so deeply.

Onward …

I am happy to have discovered the awesome yellow foliage and love of wet soil sweet flag and carex enjoy. 

As the garden season comes to a close, I sit here and reflect on my first year writing a garden blog. I ask myself, “John, what did you gain from this writing gig?”. And I say:

• I have met some fantastic people 
• I have given myself a chance to do something creative and fun
• I have learned a ton from reader comments and feedback

But then, the skies opened up and provided me with the biggest benefit of all – I GET TO FOOL ALL OF YOU.

I never realized the magic of the camera when taking photos of the garden. It is like the yard is full of vain and superficial actors and actresses who insist on only being filmed from a certain angle. And I couldn’t be happier to oblige.

So I now provide you with the photos that unearth my dirty little secrets. I feel like the magician who gives up his secret as to how he really doesn’t cut the damsel in distress in half with a saw. But, I digress:

So when all looks gloomy out in the yard, I just strategically avoid all the “bad” and only give you the “good”. Consider it my little gift to you all to make your day that much better.

ONG 

These photos were taken out and about in Hunterdon County, NJ – specifically in Stockton, Sergeantsville and Rosemont.

For other awesome Fall photos check out http://www.growingthehomegarden.com/2010/09/fall-color-project-2010.html. 

Some people count sheep.


Some listen to soft soothing music. 


Others drink warm milk.


Me … I analyze an open spot in the garden and determine what I will plant there when I wake up the next day.

I often have a hard time falling asleep at night. And it is completely self induced. In fact, I enjoy the inability to sleep, it is truly a chance to let the brain run it’s course while everyone else is out cold. And here’s the kicker, I drink a half pot of caffeinated coffee every night after the kids are asleep. You say “dumb”, I say “this is where my genius is born”.    

Last night was no exception. Here is what I obsessed over while the rest of the world slept:

As you can see in the photos above, I have an open spot behind the Siberian iris, the carex and the dwarf variegated miscanthus. And here is a snapshot of the thoughts that ran through my over-caffeinated cranium:

• Like the amateur designer that you are, why do you have three similarly shaped plants together in the same spot?
• Should I move them now? Or leave until Spring?
• If they stay, you need something evergreen in that spot.
• And something deer resistant.
• And able to handle wet feet at times since the water drains off of the driveway.
• Nothing fits any of that criteria and you’re dumb to stress over it.
• Can’t you make better use of this time to analyze something important?

And if that weren’t enough, here is another site that was ripe for more of my over analysis:

And more rambling sleep deprived thoughts:

• An open prominent spot right next to the garage needs some serious attention.
• Having a single holly, a single arborvitae, a single clethra and a single barberry all together; I’m thinking they do not teach that to wanna be designers.
• With self deprecation now complete, you know you need a massed perennial in that spot, preferably something upright to off set the rounded shape of the nearby shrubs.
• Maybe I can divide more of the Siberian irises … no too late in the season for that.
• Maybe some of my beloved smaller ornamental grasses … nah … need some full season floral interest there.
• Maybe some daylilies … nope … the deer will dine on them.
• Here we go again dumb ass … you’ve created a quandary with no easy solution.
• Can my wife hear me? Am I talking out loud? Am I really this neurotic?

Needless to say, nothing has been resolved even after a long period of analysis. Guess there is always tonight to revisit it again.

Good times indeed!
ONG