The Obsessive Neurotic Gardener

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Posted on November 19, 2010 by jmarkowski Posted in Uncategorized .

Those who cannot remember the past are doomed to repeat it.

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results.  

These quotes are my rallying cry from now until the first green appears again in the spring. I have made the same mistakes over the years and dammit I am too smart and informed to be doing so. It is time to practice what I preach and do this right. No more excuses, no more laziness and I need to remember why patience is such a crucial part of the gardening experience.  

Here are the photos not only to demonstrate my ineptitude, but to also light a fire under my ass to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Here goes:

What happens when you plant a shrub in the heat of summer and do not keep up with the watering as required:     
  

Do not leave a shrub out of the soil for a long period of time when transplanting to another location and expect it to just recover in no time. Needless to say, she’s a goner:

Deer do not take a year off from dining al fresco and crossing your fingers is not really a good deterrent:

The soil you use in containers is kind of a big deal, especially if it doesn’t drain real well. Hello blossom end rot:  

When taking photos of your beloved plants, it makes them a little more appealing when there isn’t a distracting or unappealing background:

You might want to consider the quality of the photo before exposing it to the world, even if it helps tell a pretty funny story:     

Roses and soil that doesn’t drain well do not mix. Even the so-called fool proof knockout roses:

Mint is sort of aggressive and all precaution should be taken to control it:

“No seriously, I’ll find room for those 25 plants. I’ll keep them in the garage for now.”  

“Oh, you mean I should make plans to keep the containers watered while we are on vacation for a week in the dead of summer”:  

Remind me again what a plant looks like when it requires division. I’m not familiar with that phenomenon:

This might be my greatest sin of all. I am well read on pruning and size control for almost all perennials. How I let this happen is beyond me. I hang my head in shame.

Have a great weekend.
ONG

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7 Comments
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7 Responses

  1. Orkneyflowers says
    November 19, 2010 at 10:48 pm

    We’ve all done it – haven’t we if we are truthful – thank you for the reminder of what-not-to-do (but we all do!)

    Off to put the cutting material I got by post out into the coldframe – cos if I don’t when I come home in a couple of days they will be dead…………

    Thank you again!

  2. scottweberpdx says
    November 19, 2010 at 11:30 pm

    OMG…I fear I am guilty of most, if not all, of these sins! The trimming to keep things from flopping is my most grievous sin…I just can’t bring myself to crop them when they seem so happy…but then I curse myself when they flop just as they bloom 🙁 I would add planting things in part shade thinking it will be enough sun to keep them from growing tall, spindly and hideous.

  3. Tatyana@MySecretGarden says
    November 20, 2010 at 4:14 am

    Take me to your club!

  4. Byddi Lee says
    November 20, 2010 at 6:26 pm

    I prefer to refer to these types of things as “experiments” as opposed to “mistakes”. Unlike mistakes it is permissible to repeat the experiment in the interests of further validating your results!

  5. That Bloomin' Garden says
    November 21, 2010 at 7:21 pm

    You are so funny! I love to read your posts. I can totally relate to all the above misadventures. Gardeners and their learning curves, guess thats how we learn.

  6. allanbecker-gardenguru says
    November 22, 2010 at 3:24 am

    How polite of you to call Mint “sort of aggressive”. My adjectives for that plant are not welcome in a family-friendly blog.

  7. Janet/Plantaliscious says
    November 24, 2010 at 6:09 pm

    Three cheers for you, for being willing to document the “don’t do this again” traps we all fall in to but rarely confess to.

Comments are closed.

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